I’ve spent a lot of time talking about mental health lately, rightfully so as this time of year can impact everyone differently. Weather, daylight savings, holidays, financial stress, personal tragedy. The weight of life right now is very heavy for most of us. We forget we are human beings and there’s one thought I keep coming back to.
We work in an industry built around caring for people, yet sometimes we forget that the people providing that care need it too. This is not a luxury. IT IS A NECESSITY.
I think about what our employees deal with every day. The resident you’ve grown close to who is declining. The family member who’s upset, and you’re the person standing in front of them. The coworker who calls off, leaving everyone else to pick up the slack. The expectations to do more, move faster, and somehow find a way to make everything work.
And then there’s the part nobody at work sees.
The distance in a relationship widening. The bills that keep coming. The kids who need your time and presence. The parent whose health is declining. The personal battles you’re fighting that nobody knows anything about.
But you show up anyway.
You put on your name badge, walk through those doors, and spend the next eight or twelve hours making sure someone else is okay.
Then you go home, and you’re expected to have something left for the people waiting there.
That’s a lot of weight to bear.
I’m someone who has always believed in working hard, taking responsibility, and figuring things out. I’m a fixer. When there’s a problem, I want to solve it. And when things get difficult, my instinct is usually to push harder.
But I’ve learned that just because you can carry something doesn’t mean you should, especially not alone.
The assumption that someone keeps showing up and doing their job, that they’re doing okay isn’t always the truth.
Some of the people who are struggling the most are the same people who never miss a shift, never complain, and are always the first to help someone else.
We see their work ethic. We see their dependability. We wish we could be like them. So they go unchecked on.
We don’t ever stop to ask how they’re actually doing?
And when we do ask, are we willing to hear something other than “I’m fine”?
I don’t believe mental health is about being happy every day. Life doesn’t work that way. The realistic part of life is 5-10% can affect the remaining percentage.
There are going to be difficult seasons. There are going to be days when we’re frustrated, exhausted, overwhelmed, or simply don’t have much left to give.
But I don’t think we should accept feeling that way all the time as just part of the job.
Caring for other people shouldn’t require you to completely lose yourself in the process.
That’s why, amongst a number of other programs, I want to remind everyone about something we have available through our Employee Assistance Program.
Through Health Advocate, you have access to support for the things that life throws at you. Stress, anxiety, grief, relationship problems, parenting challenges, financial concerns, and more.
The program offers 1–3 counseling sessions per topic or issue, if needed, along with work/life resources and access to legal and financial consultations.
You don’t have to be in crisis to use it. You don’t need to have some major life event happen. And you certainly don’t need to feel embarrassed about reaching out.
Health Advocate EAP
- Phone: 877.240.6863
- Email: [email protected]
- Website: HealthAdvocate.com/prioritylifecare
- Client Code: 3KXC3RB
Crisis assistance is available 24/7.
You can be anywhere in your life and just need someone to listen and be objective.
If you’re someone who spends your days caring for residents, supporting coworkers, leading a team, or making sure an entire community operates the way it should, I hope you understand how much that matters.
But I also hope you understand that you matter even when you’re not doing something for someone else.
You matter when you’re tired.
You matter when you’re struggling.
You matter when you don’t have the answers.
And you matter on the days when all you can manage to do is show up.
I don’t want us to become an organization that only talks about appreciating employees when they’re doing something for us. I want us to be an organization that recognizes they’re people first, with lives, responsibilities, and struggles that extend well beyond our communities.
Because at the end of the day, our residents deserve to be cared for by people who feel cared for themselves.
And our employees deserve that care regardless of what they can give back.
So check on your people. Really check on them.
And if you’re the one who’s struggling, please don’t convince yourself you have to figure everything out alone.
We spend so much of our lives making sure everyone else is okay.
It’s okay to need someone to make sure you’re okay, too.
